Relationships are amazing, but they can be confusing at best and very messy at worst. We all know communication is critical to having a good relationship, but most of us don’t know HOW!!! One of the things that makes communication so difficult is the fact that men and women are DIFFERENT. You’re like, tell me something I don’t know….but as matter of fact as this is, when the differences cause turmoil we act as if this isn’t true.
For example, I used to ask my wife, “Honey do you care if I go fishing tomorrow?” She’d respond VERBALLY with something like, “sure, I guess that would be okay.” Meanwhile, her body language is not giving me the green light. So, I’d press her, “Are you sure it’s alright because if it’s not I won’t go.” She’d reply, “Yeah, it’s fine.” Have you ever experienced something like this? As a guy, of course, I went fishing, after all, I got permission. But, what do you think happened when I got home (probably later than expected…)? Now, if you know my wife, she isn’t going to say anything, but her mood and body language could speak loudly. (Now my wife is a saint and we have a great marriage so I don’t want to paint her in a negative light, but I do want to make a point).
If you’re a woman reading this, you’re like, seriously Sean, you really went fishing – wasn’t it obvious she didn’t want you to go. If you’re a guy reading this, you’re like, seriously, why didn’t she just tell you she didn’t want you to go. Here lies the problem. Generally speaking, women assume men should just know and most men are black and white, and don’t read into that which isn’t verbally spoken. Instead of arguing about this, we all have work to do. I encourage women to work hard at verbally communicating what they think (instead of hoping their man will “just get it”). I encourage men to be more aware of their spouse’s non-verbal cues, ask more questions, and then make the best decision possible.
We must accept our differences, respect them, and NOT try to change the other person, but we do have to WORK at communicating as it will never be easy. Have fun.
